CBWL 059

Bojangles Coliseum – Charlotte, North Carolina

Friday Morning – Go-Home Show

Cowboy sat at the head of a long table in one of the smaller conference rooms just off the main hallway. Across from him sat Elena, Bill Parcells, Joan Rivers, and Tony Soprano. The door was closed, and the four agents were already settled in as Cowboy looked over a few notes in front of him.

He set the papers down and leaned back in his chair.

Cowboy Watts: “Alright, here’s how the show is laid out. I’ll run through it so we’re all clear.”

He started going down the list.

Cowboy Watts: “We open with Mariska in the ring under dim lights, wearing something purple and strapless. She apologizes for not having a ring again, talks about hardworking men being held down by the system, ties it into Sterling, and announces there’s gonna be a major announcement at the PPV on Sunday about the future of CBWL.”

He moved on without pausing.

Cowboy Watts: “After that, we go to Wendy interviewing Pam Beesly. Wendy does her usual loud, all-over-the-place interview. Pam goes out to the plywood afterward, waits for an opponent that doesn’t show up, and Mila Kunis comes out of the crowd and beats the shit out of her. Mila cuts the promo about fucking Jim. That’s the segment.”

He kept going.

Cowboy Watts: “Next is Kristen Bell versus Boxxy on the plywood. Kristen goes over in a fluke finish. Anya’s at ringside but doesn’t help. Simple match, keeps the iCarlys looking beatable.”

He flipped to the next page in his notes.

Cowboy Watts: “After that match, we go to the hospital segment. Sterling in the bed — we’re not showing all the machines so he doesn’t look weak. Nicki Minaj is in there with him doing the lapdance and stroking angle. She talks about how CBWL relies on hardworking men like Sterling and says she knows he’ll be ready by Sunday. Then we cut to Emma watching from the shadows with that creepy grin before we fade out.”

He continued.

Cowboy Watts: “After we come back from commercial, we go to Jennette McCurdy versus Florence Pugh on the plywood. Florence gets a fluke win. After the match, Wendy does a post-match interview with Florence while they’re both eating cheese. During the interview, Mariska comes out and forces the ‘Eat My Shit’ match on Florence for Sunday as punishment.”

He looked around the table.

Cowboy Watts: “After that, we go to Taylor Swift in the ring. She’s shaking her ass, doing the sob story about Sterling, thanks Nicki, says she’ll take over for her later and winks at the camera, then dances to the Cha-Cha Slide. While she’s still out there, we cut backstage to Emma beating the shit out of Nicki. She dumps Sterling out of the bed onto the floor, straps Nicki to the gurney, and pushes it down the stairs. We cut back to Taylor — she sees it and runs to the back to check on Sterling.”

He leaned back slightly.

Cowboy Watts: “Later in the night, we have Miranda helping Emma escape in the parking garage. Taylor catches them, beats the shit out of Miranda, leaves her laying next to Sterling’s truck, and then rushes back to Sterling’s side. We end the show on the truck.”

Cowboy looked around at the four of them.

Cowboy Watts: “That’s the show. Any questions before we start breaking down who’s handling what tonight?”

The room stayed quiet for a few seconds. Elena, Bill Parcells, Joan Rivers, and Tony all shook their heads or gave small nods of understanding. Nobody had anything to add.

Cowboy Watts: “Alright then. We’re all on the same page.”

Joan Rivers spoke up next.

Joan Rivers: “One thing — how many segments is this show actually getting broken up into? Because from what you just laid out, it feels like we’re stacking a lot of story stuff on top of each other. How spread out is all this gonna be?”

Cowboy leaned back in his chair and thought for a second before answering.

Cowboy Watts: “We’ve got a decent amount of segments tonight. Between the promos, the hospital stuff, the parking garage angle, and the matches, it’s gonna feel pretty story-heavy. We’re not loading it with a ton of extra matches because we’re trying to get through everything we need to set up for Sunday. It’s gonna be tight, but it should flow.”

He looked over at Joan.

Cowboy Watts: “You worried about the pacing?”

Joan Rivers: “A little. I just wanna make sure we’re not cramming too much in and making the show feel like a mess. We’ve already got no ring to deal with.”

Cowboy gave a small nod.

Cowboy Watts: “We’ll keep an eye on it. If something feels like it’s dragging or stacking too heavy, we can trim it on the fly. But right now, this is what we’ve got.”

Cowboy looked over the updated format sheet and started reading it out loud for everyone at the table.

Cowboy Watts: “Here’s the final format for tonight. We split a few of the heavier segments so they don’t feel rushed.”

He went down the list.

Cowboy Watts:

“Segment 1 – Opening Promo Mariska in the ring under dim lights, wearing something purple and strapless. She apologizes for not having a ring again, talks about hardworking men being held down by the system, ties it into Sterling, and announces there will be a major announcement at the PPV on Sunday regarding the future of CBWL.”

“Segment 2 – Interview + Match Wendy interviews Pam Beesly. Pam goes out to the plywood after. Mila Kunis comes out of the crowd and beats the shit out of her. Mila cuts a promo about fucking Jim. We’re treating this as a match because of the attack.”

“Segment 3 – Match Kristen Bell versus Boxxy on the plywood. Kristen wins in a fluke finish. Anya is at ringside but doesn’t help Boxxy.”

“Segment 4A – Hospital Part 1 Sterling in the hospital bed with minimal machines shown. Nicki Minaj is in the room giving him a lapdance and stroking him. She talks about how CBWL relies on hardworking men like Sterling and says she knows he’ll be ready by Sunday.”

“Segment 4B – Hospital Part 2 Cut to Emma Watson watching from the shadows with a creepy grin. She gets an idea before we fade out.”

“Segment 5A – Match + Interview Jennette McCurdy versus Florence Pugh on the plywood. Florence wins in a fluke finish. After the match, Wendy does a post-match interview with Florence while the two of them eat cheese together.”

“Segment 5B – Angle During the interview, Mariska comes out and forces the ‘Eat My Shit’ match on Florence for Sunday. She also announces the Escape the Stall rematch between The iCarlys and Boxxy & Anya.”

“Segment 6A – Main Event Angle Part 1 Taylor Swift in the ring. She’s shaking her ass, doing the sob story about Sterling, thanks Nicki Minaj, says she’ll take over for her later and winks at the camera, then dances to the Cha-Cha Slide.”

“Segment 6B – Main Event Angle Part 2 While Taylor is still in the ring, we cut backstage to Emma beating the shit out of Nicki. Emma dumps Sterling out of the bed onto the floor, straps Nicki to the gurney, and pushes it down the stairs. We cut back to Taylor — she sees it and runs to the back.”

“Segment 7 – Closing Angle After we come back from commercial, we go backstage where Taylor, Wendy, and Mariska are with Sterling. Mariska authorizes Taylor to go after Emma. Taylor goes to the parking garage but Emma is already gone. Miranda Cosgrove is helping Emma escape. Taylor beats the shit out of Miranda and leaves her laying next to Sterling’s vandalized truck. We end the show on the truck.”

Cowboy set the sheet down and looked around the table.

Cowboy Watts: “That’s the full format. Eleven segments total. We split the heavier ones so they breathe a little better. Any issues with this before we start figuring out who’s covering what tonight?”

Tony leaned forward in his chair after Cowboy finished going over the format.

Tony Soprano: “Alright, so who’s getting what segments? I wanna know who’s covering what tonight.”

He looked around the table, then focused back on Cowboy.

Tony Soprano: “And while we’re at it, anything involving Wendy — I want that. I’ve been the one dealing with her the last few days. I know how she operates when she’s like this. I don’t want somebody else stepping in and fucking it up just because they don’t know how to handle her. If it’s got Wendy in it, it should go through me.”

Cowboy looked over at him, not particularly impressed by the tone.

Cowboy Watts: “You’re not running the whole show, Tony. But yeah, most of the Wendy stuff was already gonna land on you anyway. You’ve been stuck with her this whole week, so it makes sense.”

Tony didn’t back off.

Tony Soprano: “Good. Just making sure we’re clear. I don’t want some random agent or one of these other guys trying to step in and tell her what to do. She’s already a fucking handful as it is.”

Joan Rivers raised an eyebrow but didn’t say anything yet. Elena stayed quiet, watching the exchange.

Cowboy Watts: “Like I said, you’ll get the Wendy stuff. But don’t start thinking you’re running the whole night. We still got a lot of other shit to cover.”

Tony leaned back in his chair, still looking a little annoyed but satisfied for now.

Tony Soprano: “Fine. Just don’t fuck me on the Wendy segments. That’s all I’m saying.”

Before anyone else could speak, Cowboy sat up straight and looked Tony dead in the eye.

Cowboy Watts: “Let me make something real fuckin’ clear to you right now, Tony.”

His voice was low, but sharp.

Cowboy Watts: “I don’t give a fuck who you are, where you come from, or what kind of background you got. I don’t care about none of that shit. This ain’t your show. This is my fuckin’ show. You got that?”

Tony stared back at him, his jaw tightening slightly, but Cowboy didn’t flinch.

Cowboy Watts: “You’ll get the Wendy stuff because it makes sense for you to handle it. Not because you demanded it. And if I hear one more word about you trying to run shit around here, we’re gonna have a real problem. You work for me on this show. Not the other way around. Got it?”

The room was quiet for a moment. Elena watched the exchange without saying anything. Joan raised an eyebrow but stayed out of it. Bill Parcells kept his arms crossed, observing.

Tony didn’t say anything right away. He just stared at Cowboy for a few seconds before finally giving a small nod.

Tony Soprano: (flat) “…Yeah. I got it.”

Cowboy held his stare for another second before leaning back in his chair.

The room stayed quiet for a few seconds after Cowboy shut Tony down. Tony didn’t push back any further — he just gave a short nod and leaned back in his chair, clearly deciding it wasn’t worth pressing.

Cowboy didn’t say anything else right away. He just stared at the table for a moment, his jaw still tight.

For a second, his mind drifted.

He thought about the old days — back when he was running his own territory. Back when he didn’t have to explain himself to anybody. If somebody stepped out of line, he handled it. If somebody thought they were bigger than the promotion, he made sure they understood real quick that they weren’t. He didn’t care how much money they made on the side or what kind of connections they had outside the business. In his ring, under his watch, his word was law.

He’d built his reputation on being the kind of promoter who didn’t play politics and didn’t tolerate bullshit. He ran a tight ship, and everybody knew it. The boys respected him — some even feared him — because they knew he wasn’t the type to let things slide. If you worked for him, you fell in line. If you didn’t, you were gone. Simple as that.

Cowboy blinked and came back to the present. He looked around the table at the four agents sitting in front of him.

Tony might’ve come from a different world, but that didn’t mean shit in here. This wasn’t some street crew or backroom deal. This was his promotion. And he wasn’t about to let anybody — no matter who they were or where they came from — start thinking they could run things.

He cleared his throat and spoke again, his voice back to its usual blunt tone.

Cowboy Watts: “Like I said. We’re moving on. Let’s figure out who’s covering what tonight.”

He looked around the table, making it clear the conversation about Tony trying to muscle in on segments was over.

Cowboy Watts: “Alright, here’s how we’re breaking it down. Listen up.”

He pointed at Elena first.

Cowboy Watts: “Elena, you’re on anything involving Emma tonight. That means you stay close during the hospital segment, the big angle with Taylor later, and the parking garage stuff at the end. If Emma goes off-script or does something stupid, you’re the one stepping in. You’re also with me on the Mariska open — make sure that promo stays on track.”

He looked at Joan next.

Cowboy Watts: “Joan, you’re on creative and promos. You stay on Taylor’s ring segment and the closing angle with her, Wendy, and Mariska. If anything feels off with the promos or the flow, you speak up. You’re also keeping an eye on the Pam and Mila match — make sure it doesn’t drag.”

He turned to Bill Parcells.

Cowboy Watts: “Parcells, you’re floating. You’re between production and the floor. If something goes wrong technically or we need to make a quick call on the fly, you’re the one handling it. You’re also keeping an eye on the two matches — Kristen vs Boxxy and Jennette vs Florence. Make sure they don’t go too long.”

Finally, he looked at Tony.

Cowboy Watts: “Tony, you’re on Wendy. That means the interview with Pam, the post-match stuff with Florence, and anything else she’s involved in tonight. You already know how to handle her, so don’t let her wander off or start doing her own thing. Keep her on script.”

He looked around the table one more time.

Cowboy Watts: “Anybody got a problem with their assignments?”

Bill Parcells: “Before we wrap this up, I could use some help with the Jennette versus Florence match. Those two could be difficult to work with, especially with how Florence is supposed to be acting right now. I’d rather not be the only one out there trying to keep that match on track.”

He looked over at Tony.

Bill Parcells: “Tony, you mind stepping in on that one with me? You’ve been dealing with some of the messier stuff this week anyway. Could use another set of eyes on it.”

Tony didn’t look thrilled about being asked, but he didn’t immediately shut it down either. He glanced at Cowboy first before answering.

Tony Soprano: “Yeah, I can help. Just don’t expect me to babysit the whole match. I got enough shit to deal with already with Wendy.”

Cowboy gave a short nod.

Cowboy Watts: “Fine. Tony, you can float over and help Parcells with that match. Just make sure you’re still keeping an eye on Wendy when she’s out there.”

He looked around the table one last time.

Cowboy Watts: “Anything else? Or are we good to go?”

The room stayed quiet.

Cowboy Watts: “Alright then. Let’s get to work.”